Saturday, September 25, 2010
The Saturday Plan...
Friday, September 17, 2010
You'll Know Yours Is A Redneck Church If:
You'll Know Yours Is A Redneck Church If: |
The finance committee refuses to provide funds for the purchase of a chandelier because none of the members knows how to play one.
People ask, when they learn that Jesus fed the 5000, whether the two fish were bass or catfish, and what bait was used to catch 'em.
When the pastor says, "I'd like to ask Bubba to help take up the offering", five guys and two women stand up.
Opening day of deer season is recognized as an official church holiday.
A member of the church requests to be buried in his 4-wheel-drive truck because "It ain't never been in a hole it couldn't get out of,"
The choir is known as the "OK Chorale."
Boone's Farm "Tickle Pink" is the favorite wine for communion.
In a congregation of 500 members, there are only seven last names in the church directory.
Baptism is referred to as "branding."
There is a special fund raiser for a new church septic tank.
Finding and returning lost sheep isn't just a parable.
High notes on the organ set the dogs to howling.
People think "rapture" is what you get when you lift something too heavy.
The baptismal font is a #2 galvanized livestock watering trough.
The choir robes were donated by (and embroidered with the logo from) Billy Bob's Barbecue.
The collection plates are really hub caps from a '56 Chevy.
ISSN 0161-8121
Monday, September 6, 2010
This Was A Big Labor Day... A Rejoicing Day...
This photo is of my very own jars. Before I put them in the water bath. See pretty new jars and new lids (always use new lids) and new screw bands. Our canned stuff is stored in the basement and the screw bands tend to rust, so they don't last long. I love the look of these.. so pretty and new and yummy tasting.. shiny too.
Saturday, September 4, 2010
It's September, But It Sure Feels Like Fall...
Friday, September 3, 2010
One Huge Tomato
Wednesday, September 1, 2010
Girlie Wisdom.. Thanks Julie !!!
1 A friend of mine confused her Valium with her birth control pills... she now has 14 kids but she doesn't really care..
2. One of life's mysteries is how a 2-pound box of chocolates can make a woman gain 5 lbs.
3. My mind not only wanders, it sometimes leaves completely.
4. The best way to forget your troubles is to wear tight shoes.
5. The nice part about living in a small town is that when you don't know what you are doing, someone else does.
6. The older you get, the tougher it is to lose weight, because by then your body and your fat are really good friends.
7. Just when I was getting used to yesterday, along came today...
8 Sometimes I think I understand everything, and then I regain consciousness.
9. I gave up jogging for my health when my thighs kept rubbing together and setting fire to my panties.
10. Amazing! You hang something in your closet, for a while, and it shrinks 2 sizes!
11. Skinny people irritate me! Especially when they say things like...'You know sometimes I forget to eat!'.....Now, I've forgotten my address, my mother's maiden name, and my keys, but I have never forgotten to eat. You have to be a special kind of stupid to forget to eat!
12. The trouble with some women is that they get all excited about nothing and then they marry him.
13. I read this article that said the typical symptoms of stress are eating too much, impulse buying, and driving too fast. Are they kidding? That's my idea of a perfect day!